Watching, Wanting and Waiting
by Nottoca
Summary: Sometimes just watching the person you want more than anything can cause a pain all its own. And waiting can make it even worse. Kakashi/OlderSakura, Lemon.
1. Chapter 1

Yea !!! I finally broke my writer's block – kinda, sorta, maybe. That's actually up to anyone reading this, but seeing as how I didn't write _anything_ for a month and this actually counts as a written fic, I think it's broken at least temporarily. Or it was until I realized I had to come up with a title and summary. I always forget about that – it's the hardest part. until I get back into the swing of things, I may be writing crap for a bit. Sigh. lemme know if there's suggestions on how to deal with these sorts of problems (be it the writing crap or the writer's block). And I'm going to start off telling you there will be a lemon – after all, one can never practice lemon writing enough. (And I enjoy it WAY too much)

edited: 11-30-08

* * *

Sakura's eyes narrowed as she watched The Woman slide onto the barstool next to Kakashi's. Her long black hair hung free and brushed against his arm as she reached past him for a napkin to set under her drink. Her head lowered and she leaned close to whisper something in his ear. Kakashi turned to face her, his eyes raking up and down her generous figure, displayed all the more by the tight low-cut blue dress she wore. Sakura took another sip from her frilly frozen drink and tried to suppress the feelings churning in her stomach.

What was it that was bothering her? It wasn't nervousness; she was just surveying the area, insuring everything went smoothly and without any outside interruptions. She wasn't the one who was trying to get close to the target and at the moment there weren't any indications of something going wrong, everything was going exactly according to Kakashi's plan.

It couldn't be jealousy she was feeling when she saw Kakashi's responses to The Woman's flirtations, could it? They were on a mission, for god's sake! She shouldn't let emotions get in the way of a mission and she knew better. She'd never felt jealousy for him before, so why now? It wasn't as if Kakashi and she were dating or anything… just because she wanted to see him give her the hungry look he was now giving That Woman…

She was being ridiculous. They were on a mission and she really shouldn't be looking at her partner like this. He had been her teacher ten years ago and had been her team leader for the past seven or eight years and her occasional 2-man team partner on and off for the past handful of years. No matter if this was part of the mission, no matter if this was what she secretly wanted from him. She was an accomplished kunoichi of the leaf village and knew better than to let any silly fantasies or emotions affect a mission even if it was just a low B-class one. She may know better but she couldn't seem to stop them. She sighed, cursing the client who had specifically requested them for his mission, even if he had promised a substantial bonus if successful.

Sakura took another, deeper drink form her glass wondering exactly how much alcohol there really was in these frozen concoctions. Even with her well-versed palate, she was having a hard time identifying the liquor. She brushed those thoughts aside and took another sip.

There was a bit still left in the glass so she looked questioningly at the waitress as she set another paper-umbrella garnished drink on her table. The waitress leaned down and whispered that the drink was from The Man at a table across the bar, turning her head slightly to indicate the person she was speaking about. Sakura again sighed softly; she really didn't want to deal with flirting men tonight. She just wanted to watch her partner make the initial contact with their target, go back to her hotel and sleep for a week. No, strike that, she didn't _want_ to watch Kakashi get friendly with The Woman, but it was part of the mission and the mission always came first. So Sakura took the drink, thanked the waitress and flashed a small smile at The Man across the room, giving a slight nod of her head in thanks. _Please don't let this guy get aggressive about this… for god's sake, Kakashi, hurry this up!_

Unfortunately, this wasn't the sort of mission one could hurry (few were), so she may just have to flirt with The Man who sent her the drink, especially if he came over to her table. It wasn't that he wasn't attractive; it was that her heart was, once again, hung up on a man who didn't love her. She took another deep drink, emptying the contents of her glass and staring longingly at the next. What was this, three? Four? She couldn't remember, but it wasn't that important. She merely had to keep watch until Kakashi signaled her.

It had been a year ago. Or maybe it was two, she couldn't remember exactly when, perhaps it was even before that, but she had stopped seeing Kakashi as her teacher and more as a friend, a man who she had developed feelings for. She hadn't meant for it to happen, but it had.

When the time had come for Sakura to take the jounin exam, she'd asked Kakashi to help her prepare. Tsunade was a wonderful teacher to learn medic skills from, but when it came to basic ninja skills, Sakura turned to Kakashi, who had willingly helped the student he felt he had abandoned. Not only had his assistance helped her pass the exam, their teamwork skills as a pair had increased exponentially. Aware of this, Tsunade tried to keep them on teams together no matter the number of additional teammates, be it a team of six or paired with Naruto and Sasuke or just the two of them. And of course Kakashi continued his solo missions, sometimes returning wounded and turning to Sakura who scolded him the entire time it took to heal him.

After the whole Sasuke-relationship-fiasco and the way her last few dates with some of the men of Kahona had gone, she was determined to avoid romantic relationships for a while. But Kakashi had snuck up on her. She hadn't expected it, hadn't even seen it until it was too late and by then, her heart had already been stolen by a man who didn't even know he had it.

Kakashi was the one she turned to when she and Sasuke broke up, and he'd comforted her when she felt her world was falling apart. Ino was no help, Naruto had been completely wrapped up with his burgeoning relationship with Hinata, Sakura's own parents were gone, but Kakashi had had been there, ready to listen. She had tried not to cry in front of him, but realizing Sasuke hadn't been looking for a soul-mate but rather a woman willing to be continually pregnant until menopause was a painful realization.

While Sakura did want children, she wasn't ready for them yet, especially if it meant giving up her career as a kunoichi. She also realized the boy she had loved, after years of obsessing about revenge on his brother for the death of the rest of his clan, was incapable of feeling for her the way she felt for him and coming to this conclusion eventually broke her obsession with the boy, finally letting her see him as a person instead of an object of desire.

In the end, coming to that conclusion hadn't been the worst thing to ever happen to her; later she found their teamwork had improved and she now felt more of a brotherly affection for the Uchiha. At the time, she had been devastated but Kakashi had managed to convince her it was for the best, considering Sasuke's new obsession of repopulating his clan. Kakashi even got her to laugh a few times that night and it was probably then that Sakura first started to fall for him.

Again, she hadn't meant to, but it had happened before she even realized it. It was his jokes, his friendly and comfortable presence and the way he treated her that all made her look at him a bit differently. He liked to flirt with her, tease her, get her angry enough to yell sometimes but not actually injure anyone, and then he'd completely defuse her anger with only a couple of well chosen words. He exasperated her, bothered her endlessly, annoyed her beyond words, but in an odd way, she enjoyed it. Probably because he'd give her his special eye-crease, indicating a smile and sometimes she could even draw a soft chuckle from his lips.

Sakura took the paper umbrella from her drink, dropping it on the table with the others and sipped through the straw, enjoying the sweet taste that flooded her mouth. She smiled ruefully; no matter what she felt for him, he would only ever see her as his student, an immature child he would never even consider having romantic feelings for. She could remind herself of this time and time again but every now and then, she'd see him looking at her with a certain unidentified expression on his face and he'd smile softly, sending her heart racing.

Her eyes returned to the barstools in time to see The Woman reach over and trace the band of his black eye patch, her hand moving to the cloth directly over his eye and made as if to lift it up. Kakashi's hand immediately stopped her wrist, preventing her from removing the patch. With a wry smile, he shook his head at her. Sakura could almost hear him give his soft rebuke. She had watched him do this before, flirting with a target, stirring the target's interest.

He'd shown Sakura his face long ago as his congratulations for becoming a jounin and he was even more handsome than she'd thought he'd be. It wasn't the beauty of Sasuke or the aristocratic features of Neji or the winning and determined enthusiasm of Naruto that made each of them attractive in their own way. For Kakashi, it was his smile that caught her eye, a smile filled with mischief to match that which sometimes shone in his eyes. She then learned why he wore the mask; his mouth was his most expressive feature and by covering it up, he didn't have to worry about keeping a neutral expression.

Out of the corner of her eye, she continued watching him. He looked so good tonight. Black pants and a charcoal grey sweater suited him amazingly well and it didn't hurt that he wasn't wearing his mask. He'd given Tsunade a very annoyed look when she told him he could wear the eye patch but not the mask. These were the missions Sakura rather enjoyed, those when he was unable to wear both his hitai-ate and mask, giving her a chance to see that smile now and then. And of course, he used that eye patch it to his advantage, making him seem more mysterious and giving the target something to try and remove from him as a form of flirtation.

She'd seen him do this a number of times but tonight it really bothered her. She didn't want him playing that sort of game with That Woman.

It's just a mission, she kept repeating to herself silently in her head.

_Sounds like you're jealous. _

Shut up, she thought angrily. You know nothing about this.

_Don't be an idiot, of course I know about this. I see what you see, feel what you feel._

Fine, but it's not jealousy

_Bullshit. Just jump him already._

Sakura shook her head. God, where was this coming from? She and Kakashi were a team, both complete professionals when on a mission. Something silly like jumping him would put that mission at risk and was just plain idiotic. Kakashi was off limits in more ways than one.

_You know you want him…_

Yes, fine, she did but acting on it was sheer lunacy. She liked these missions together, usually. Time spent without Naruto and his loud annoying voice, without Sai and his abrasive and rude comments, without Sasuke picking fights with everyone and without Yamato and his scary face. She enjoyed working with only Kakashi, being the only one he gave his attention to. But this mission required he give his attention to someone else and she was forced to sit here and watch it.

There was a movement she caught out of the corner of her eye, her face turning quickly toward it. Oh, crap, it was The Man who bought her the drink. Damn it, Kakashi, couldn't you have finished this sooner?

* * *

Out of the corner of his own eye, Kakashi saw The Man from the table across the room move toward Sakura. He should have known she was too pretty to be able to sit alone, no matter how many glances she made at the door. It was those glances that gave the impression she was waiting for someone, although, after enough time some man was bound to believe her date had stood her up meaning it was now safe to approach her. There was no way he could stop it without compromising the mission; he'd just have to sit here and flirt with his target to get invited to the event tomorrow and watch as Sakura was hit on by the slime-ball walking toward her.

In his head, he knew having Sakura sitting with another man was a better cover than having her sit alone and appear to be waiting for her date, but he didn't have to like it. What if The Man got fresh or started pawing at her?

That was a completely ridiculous thought. Sakura was a jounin and could handle herself - god knows, he and Tsunade had been the ones who trained her. Thanks to Tsunade, she could break That Man with a single finger and thanks to him she could… well... she could take a bell away from him. Kakashi nearly groaned out loud.

Tsunade was the one to train Sakura and he'd been the one who made the choice to abandon her. Sasuke'd had such potential as a genin. Then again, so had Naruto and Sakura, but he'd felt he'd owed it to Obito to help the last Uchiha and as the only other Sharingan user in the village, he was the last person who could instruct him in its use. He'd made his choice between his students and by doing so, he'd neglected his duty to other two. Naruto was strong enough and determined enough to continue on his own and, knowing about the growing threats toward Naruto, Jiraiya came and quickly took him under his wing, but Sakura… Sakura had been abandoned until she just happened to encounter Tsunade months later.

His own failure with team 7 gave him a reason not to accept another genin team – that and the fact no other team had managed to pass the bell test. But he knew it was just another excuse. In reality, he didn't want to screw up another team.

Years later, when Sakura had turned to him for help training for the jounin exam, he'd been unable to refuse. It wasn't that he _wanted_ to refuse but he saw it as an opportunity to make up for his previous failures as her teacher. Oddly enough, he'd found he enjoyed the time spent with her and was constantly amazed at how skilled she'd become.

One evening, walking home together from an extra long session, he'd mentioned his belief that he'd failed her. Sakura had stopped in her tracks and punched him straight in the stomach, throwing him back a good ten feet. While he was sitting on the ground trying to regain his breath from her surprise punch, she explained that she regretted nothing from her genin days, (well, almost nothing) because if the littlest part of her past was different, she may not have sought out Tsunade and then she wouldn't have found her true calling as a med-nin.

While he could see her point, her words only slightly relieved him of the guilty feelings that plagued him. It constantly surprised him that even though he had left her and Naruto to go teach his one student that ended up abandoning the village, she didn't hate him for it. Of course, Sasuke had come back eventually, but it didn't relieve him of his guilt because of all the people Sasuke had injured or killed to get to his brother.

Slowly, he had realized it was more than just an enjoyment of being around her during their sparring sessions and lunches by the stream, or sometimes meeting her 'accidentally' in the bar. She was smart and sweet and oh-so-much fun to tease. He liked watching her when she was angry, too, especially when he wasn't the on she was mad at. But there was more.

The small movement to the side of him brought him back from his thoughts. He should be concentrating on The Woman next to him not wondering why Sakura didn't hate him. The Woman had already reached for his eye patch once and he could see her hand was ready to make another try. She was obviously interested, but he sensed she just wasn't yet interested enough to mention she was in need of a date for the following evening. Yes, he could find another way into the party but Sakura was already part of the serving staff so for him to enter as a guest would be ideal and would cover all possible contingencies.

They had only arrived in town this same evening and had taken just a few minutes to check into the hotel before coming here. He wanted nothing more than to push The Woman next to him aside and go back to the hotel and get some sleep. Well, he wanted one thing more that involved the hotel, but it also involved dragging Sakura back to their shared room to enjoy some quality time together.

Every time he looked over there, he felt dull ache in the bottom of his stomach. He wanted her; had for a while, too, even though he may not have really acknowledged it until recently. How could any man see her and not want to touch her and feel the softness of her skin, not want to run his hands through her pale pink hair and kiss those amazing lips? Sometimes he would catch himself staring at her, continuing those thoughts, taking them further until they were both naked and their bare skin was only separated by a thin layer of sweat. He shouldn't let it get that far but sometimes he couldn't help it.

He brushed these thoughts aside and focused on The Woman next to him, only to have his concentration diverted again when he heard Sakura's soft laugh from across the room. It had to be fake. Of course it was fake. His hand shot out and caught The Woman's wrist as she once again reached for the eye-patch.

"I thought I told you I don't like showing people my scarred eye." He growled softly, leaning toward The Woman. Her other hand reached out and started to trace the scar on his cheek and he pulled back slightly, the feeling of her cool hand touching his scar bothered him. Well, he really didn't like having the scar on his face touched at all, but especially by this woman. Hmm… she had a name, he was sure of it but another soft laugh from Sakura drove it completely from his mind. He took another drink of sake and concentrated on the warm bite from the liquor.

"But I want to see it…" she pulled him closer and whispered in his ear. "It's not like I'll laugh or anything…" He could hear the pout in her voice and it annoyed him to no end. Almost as much as Sakura's next laugh would.

Another fancy drink was taken to Sakura's table along with a bottle of sake for The Man who'd joined her. She was on Kakashi's left, his bad side making it difficult to see her directly, but his well chosen seat at the bar and an even better placed mirror on the wall allowed him to see her regardless. This was her 6th drink, he'd been counting after all, and her bladder must be ready to burst. But that was her problem.

He really needed to concentrate on The Woman next to him, not his teammate, but it was becoming more and more difficult. He could see Sakura's flirting movements, the 'shy' ducking of her head as she laughed at the other man's words. Her clothing wasn't helping Kakashi's concentration difficulties. The simple black dress was practically glued to her lithe form and his increasingly distracted mind could only imagine peeling it off her back at the hotel, slowly kissing and biting the skin it covered. He almost groaned aloud in frustration when he realized she would never allow such a thing. He knew she had weapons hidden under that skin tight dress – exactly where eluded him – but they did exist and he had no doubt she would use every last one of them on him if he tried anything.

He was a dirty old man who she would never even consider having as a sexual partner, nor should she. She'd been of legal age for a number of years now but she didn't need to be saddled down with a man 14 years older than her. They worked well together, be it as a two man team or with a group of others and that relationship shouldn't be tampered with for something as silly as a single night's stand. And just thinking about her like this was risking their mission, something he instantly became aware of as The Woman next to him was starting to look put out.

Shit. Sakura was starting to become more of a hindrance than an assistance at this point. He was in a bar on a low risk mission, something more along the lines of a reconnaissance assignment than anything else. He only needed to get an invitation from The Woman next to him, something he was apparently unable to do with his partner in the room. A small flashed signal with his hand at waist height told Sakura she needed to leave. After all, it would only take a little more flirting to get that important invitation he needed so her assistance wasn't really needed.

* * *

Sakura could have cried for joy when she saw Kakashi's signal. She really shouldn't have had that last drink; not only was she feeling a little off she also had to pee like she hadn't gone in a week. And now she could get away from this creep who kept trying to feel her up under the table and away from watching Kakashi flirt with That Woman practically sitting in his lap. In a matter of seconds, she made her excuses and disappeared into the bathroom.

Coming out of the stall to wash her hands, she saw herself in the mirror. Her hair was limp now and her face looked tired with visibly dark rings under her eyes. Looking at her body, she turned sideways to look at her figure. She was lean but not quite thin because she had too much muscle mass necessary for a ninja and she was so flat and plain she could have passed for a boy. Sure her stomach was nice and trim, but so were her breasts. Okay, they weren't completely flat, but she could never be compared with her Shishou unless it was an example of extremes. Maybe she should have stuffed her bra, but what was the point? Kakashi would probably laugh at her idiotic attempt to look more feminine. How could she ever hope to compete with The Woman that was probably touching him now, one hand wrapped around his neck and the other stroking him through his pants. A sharp twist in her stomach shamed her for thinking such thoughts, reiterating she should stop thinking about such things.

She just wanted so badly for it to be her.

How many drinks had she had? She knew there were more than 2 or 3 little paper umbrellas left on her table and vaguely remembered the waitress taking some away as well.

She sighed and tucked a stray strand of hair behind her ear and turned to face the mirror again with a wry smile. She wanted so much to be the one at the bar with him right now, but he'd never give her a second glance. He would probably scold her for getting drunk and send her back to the hotel. She quickly washed her hands before cautiously sticking her head out the door. Seeing no one, she slipped down the hall and out the back door of the bar. Well, she slipped out as quietly as a ninja weaving slightly from an over indulgence in alcohol could.

The hotel was just a couple of blocks away and the cool evening air sobered her up a little. Not much, but a little. Immediately, her thoughts returned to Kakashi. He must have thought he was close to that invitation or he wouldn't have dismissed her. Or maybe it was because he wanted to get to know The Woman a little better without his former student watching him. Maybe that was it. It would be a sure way to get an invite for the party tomorrow – unless he wasn't good in bed. Nah, that was ridiculous. Everything Kakashi took seriously, he did well, and she was willing to bet he took sex seriously. All the gossip she overheard at the baths seemed to suggest so.

What she wouldn't give to experience that firsthand…

And why not? No longer concentrating on finding the hotel, she turned her attention completely over to Kakashi. She just wanted one taste of him, to know what sex like with him was like. If she wasn't able to have him just once, what would happen tomorrow when she was supposed to be part of the staff for the event? She'd be so jealous of The Woman she'd screw up – walk into someone while carrying a tray of food to the buffet table.

But if she was able to get him out of her mind things would be fine. Perhaps if she was able to concentrate on a memory she could create tonight, she'd be able to complete the mission without any slip-ups. And the best kind of memory to recall would be one that satisfied her desires.

So now she just had to find a way to convince Kakashi of helping her create one. She knew he'd be back to the hotel tonight, even if it was after sex with The Woman. A mischievous smile crossed her face and she finally noticed she'd been standing motionless in front of the hotel for at least a full minute. She pulled open the door and went upstairs, her mind racing to figure how to have her way with her teammate.

TBC...

* * *

I only see a couple of chaps for this and I can't be more specific 'cause not all of it's written. I'll try to update weekly…

And please review - let me know what you think!


	2. Chapter 2

Hi everyone! Here's the next chapter, a week later, as promised. I'm not terribly pleased with it – there's something wrong that I just can't put my finger on but i said I'd update in a week so here it is. I don't think it's quite… desperate enough. Oh, well, if you figure out what's missing, let me know. Helpful suggestions are always appreciated. Please note this chapter will most likely be edited as I write the last two chapters of the fic.

i also want to thank everyone who reviewed! i appreciate knowing people are actually reading my writing and just haven't hit the I'm Feeling Lucky button on Google's website.

please be warned: LEMON CHAPTER. if you are underage or squeamish, this probably isn't the fic for you so stop reading and try another fic. I rated it M for a reason (as you will see if you keep reading)...

edited: 11-30-08

* * *

Kakashi hesitated at the door of their shared room. Of course they shared a room; it was cheaper, it had two beds and it wasn't like they didn't sleep next to each other in the field. They were two adults that could sleep in the same room without problems, right? Except the room would smell like her and he wasn't quite ready to enter a place that would be so infused with her scent. Staring at the closed door, he tried to gather the nerve to turn the handle. It wasn't that she wore a strong perfume, a good kunoichi would never wear something that might give her away or identify her specifically, but her natural scent was more than enough for him. Sometimes his almost canine sense of smell could really cause a lot of problems.

It had taken longer than he thought it would to coax the invitation from The Woman, whatever her name really was, but he finally had it. And it had been much easier once Sakura had left. He sighed.

God, he had it for her so bad. His former student. A twenty-two year old girl fourteen years his junior. If he couldn't even go into their shared hotel room merely because of her scent, how was he going to make it through the two following days necessary to complete this mission?

Giving up, he opened the door and entered the dark room. He wasn't terribly surprised at the lack of light when he recalled how much Sakura drank. She was probably passed out on her bed, unconscious until the morning. After all, whatever it was she had been drinking would probably give her one hell of a hangover.

His thoughts earlier had been right; her sweet scent had completely permeated the entire room and he had no doubt that, if his bed smelled like her, he would have some very good dreams about her tonight. Or bad dreams about her, depending on his psyche's mood.

Closing the door silently behind him, he was surprised when a pair of hands grabbed him by the shoulders, forcefully spun him around and pressed him back hard against the heavy wooden door. He instantly recognized the chakra signature as Sakura's or, in the nearly complete darkness, he would have slit the throat of his attacker with one of the many weapons concealed on his body.

"Sakura, what are you doing?" he asked, struggling slightly in her grip and his heart now racing from how close she was. He couldn't see her in the complete darkness, but he could feel the heat of her body so very close to his. It was moments like these that made him annoyed Tsunade had taught the girl the secrets to her strength, not that there had been any moments quite like this one before.

"I'm doing what I've wanted to do all night." She whispered harshly in his ear, her hands pinning his shoulders and arms back against the door. If he activated the Sharringan, he might be able to see through the blackness but sight was unnecessary; it was probably better for him if he couldn't see her face so close to his. The scent of her hair was more than enough to send his heart racing and a spark of arousal to his cock. God, she smelled good.

Wait… she had wanted to kill him all night? His brain finally kicked in, trying to comprehend her words. It didn't make sense. If she'd wanted to kill him, he would already be dead. The second her tongue started tracing the shell of his ear, he caught on and his racing heart skipped a beat. He closed his eyes and bit his lip as her mouth moved down to suck on his earlobe. He took a shaky breath and noticed, even with her mouth on the side of his face, he could smell the sweet scent of alcohol on her breath.

"Sakura, you're drunk. You really don't want to do this." He whispered, desperately wishing she wouldn't rub her body against his like she was because certain parts of him were enjoying it entirely too much. Just feeling the swells of her breasts and her tight, hard nipples were making breathing more difficult with every passing second.

"Oh, no. I may be drunk, but I know what I want." Her voice was soft and sultry, her every breath pressed her body harder against his. Her entire weight was being used to hold him against the door, allowing her to rub her soft breasts even harder against him and the taut muscles of her stomach touching his. He was praying to god she wasn't able to feel his growing erection.

Now she was kissing his cheek softly, attempting to wear him down. He smelled like pure Kakashi, no scent of cologne or any trace of another woman on him, thank god. She had made her decision to go ahead with this no matter what and when she couldn't formulate a plan that would end up with her having sex with Kakashi, she decided the best course of action would be an ambush. And if that didn't work, she'd just tie him up and rape him. As a Plan B, it wasn't her best idea ever, but she was pretty sure that after tying him up and starting with some foreplay, he would be more than willing to fuck her. After all, for him, that's all it could be, right? Just a quick fuck; something to relieve a mutual need and never to happen again.

Her lips encountered the strap of his eye-patch and with her teeth, she bit the band and tugged, pulling it off to give her access to his entire face. Soft kisses rained down the scarred skin of his cheek and eye and for once, contact with the old injury didn't bother him in the least.

Releasing his arms, her hands moved up to his neck, holding his head while her lips dove for his mouth. Now that she'd released his shoulders, this would have been the perfect opportunity to push her away, turn on the lights and lock her in the bathroom until she sobered up, but he found he couldn't. He didn't want to. After months, maybe even years, of wanting to feel those perfectly full lips on his, he was finally given the chance. It was wrong, but still felt incredible. She opened her mouth to suck on his bottom lip, holding it with her teeth and giving a barely audible moan that stirred all the feelings in the depths of his belly. Only hesitating for a moment, he took the opportunity to slip his tongue into her mouth, enjoying the sweet taste of her earlier drinks combined with the lovely taste of her.

Pleased with his participation, Sakura gently stroked his tongue with hers, her soft moans getting louder as she tasted the sake he'd been sipping all evening. Nothing had ever felt so good as having his mouth on hers and she could feel the hunger in his kiss. The want and raw desire easily expressed with the scorching touch of his lips.

Her hands slowly slid down his chest and over the hard muscles of his abs until she reached the hem of his sweater. Lifting it, she ran her cool hands up his abdomen, dragging the shirt with her movement, a soft tingling sensation growing from where their bare skin touched. Reluctantly, he reached for her wrists stopping the movement of her hands but allowing them to remain on his chest.

"Sakura, you're drunk. We can't do this – we're on a mission." He tried to regulate his breathing and force his body to relax. He had only dreamt of this sort of opportunity, never actually believing that it could ever happen, so turning her down took an incredible amount of will power. Grudgingly, he admitted he too had probably had a drink or two too many and his body wasn't reacting quite the way he wanted it to. Could he have been drugged? No, it was only that familiar feeling of being just a step behind that he got when he drank too much, seeing as he had let Sakura's flirting with the other man get to him and had attempted to sooth himself with another bottle of sake, drinking too much was the only problem.

"You can't tell me you're not interested…" she said softly, her hips rubbing against his erection. "Because there's no way you can deny this." A hand twisted from his grasp and reached down to stroke him through his pants, involuntarily drawing a needy moan from his throat. God he was sexy! Every sound he made only strengthened her resolve to go through with this. She wanted this more than anything, she wanted him and she was going to have him, just this once.

Kakashi, on the other hand, found his resolve weakening rapidly. He had to stay strong, he reminded himself. It couldn't be him that she wanted; she was just too drunk to realize who he really was. He couldn't allow this to happen, no matter how much he desired her. He opened his mouth to speak but she cut him off.

"Shhhh…" she whispered softly. "No names." Her mouth moved down to kiss along his jaw.

His heart fell. It really wasn't him she wanted; she was only interested in sex and any warm male body would do, even his. For a second there, he had actually let himself believe he was the one she wanted; he had allowed himself that little bit of hope.

Those words, painful as they were to hear, also gave another opportunity. If she didn't want to use names, then it was okay, right? If neither of them acknowledged the other person for who they really were while they had sex, what harm was there? Well, he was sure there must be some, but the way she was moving against him made it very difficult for him to figure out what that might be. She was just so soft and her mouth was so sweet. And if they did this, _he_ could at least know it was her, even if she didn't want to acknowledge it was him. In the darkness of this hotel room, they could both pretend; she could pretend he was another man and he could pretend she actually loved him.

His hands reached up to caress her face and run through her hair. "Okay," he agreed softly in defeat, knowing she was offering him just this one night, and not even the recognition that it was her, but he would accept it. Even if she was a bit more drunk than he and recognizing that, he should respect it and push her away but he wasn't strong enough to pass up this opportunity. He just wanted her so badly and after so long, finally kissing her and feeling her hands on his body in all the places he wanted her to touch, he couldn't stop. He had strong self-control but he was still only a man.

Sakura paused for a moment, unsure of the painful ache she felt upon his agreement. She couldn't deny a feeling of disappointment. He'd been hesitant and tried to push her away until she told him no names, but he'd accepted readily after that. Apparently, the only thing that had held him back was the thought of her being the one he'd be having sex with. That meant she would never have the chance to see him look at _her_ with a hunger like the way he looked at That Woman or see him flash _her_ that flirty smile that would make her heart melt. But for one night, she could have him in the darkness of their shared hotel room, she could be close to him, touch him, be with him even if he was thinking of another woman.

"Thank you," she whispered softly, hoping her slight disappointment didn't come through in her voice. She sealed her mouth against the pulse point on his neck, feeling with her lips and tongue every beat of his heart as the blood coursed through his veins, tasting the light sweat on his skin.

He released her wrist and allowed her to drag the sweater and undershirt off over his head. Tossing them to the side, her hands again stroked the scarred skin of his body. In the dark, she relied on her sense of touch, her fingers encountering a particularly large scar across his chest and she bent her neck to lick at it softly, drawing a quiet moan from his lips. She'd like to tell him how much she wanted him and how jealous she'd been earlier, how she loved the taste of his skin and could feel the beat of his heart when her hand rested on his bare chest. She wanted to tell him she loved him.

But if she said any of those things she knew for certain he'd stop immediately and push her away.

This all answered her question if he could possibly love her and it wasn't the positive response she'd silently hoped for. Even as her fingers and lips explored his well muscled chest, she realized she had to stop all her fantasies about him. Any thoughts of a relationship had to be pushed aside. It was obvious to her that he didn't care for her like that and she needed to stop hoping he could. But how could she convince herself that it was true? Was there a way to crush that stupid little hope that he could ever love her?

His hands threaded through her soft hair, moving down to cup her face to tip her head back until he could bend down and press his lips to hers. He relished the kiss, her mouth opening easily and her tongue twining together with his, stroking and playing, the intensity growing by the second. His hands slid down her neck and shoulders, coming to the spaghetti straps of the tight little black dress. Hmmm, at least he could be the one to take it off her, even if he couldn't see the skin it revealed. Although, just because he couldn't see it only meant he'd have to feel his way around a little more, something that added to his growing anticipation.

Slipping the straps over her shoulders, he gently pushed the fabric from her body, the dress only hesitating momentarily at the flair of her hips before dropping to the ground with the soft whishing sound fabric makes when falling . His hands stroked their way down to her breasts and when sliding down and not finding a bra, his lips grinned against her mouth before continuing his explorations.

"Hmmm… going without a bra… bit of a naughty girl, aren't you?" he said in a rough whisper that sent shivers down her spine. There was something about the way he called her a naughty girl that thrilled her. She felt so alive at this moment, her body tingling with his every touch, knowing this was something she shouldn't be doing, not on a mission, not with her former teacher, but still it excited her more than a close range fight with a a challenging opponent wielding a katana and kunai. At the brush of his hands sliding up her stomach, she arched her back, pressing her breasts harder into his hands with a soft moan.

He bent his head and left a trail of kisses leading down to a nipple where he pressed his mouth against her breast, suckling hungrily. Her hands ran through his hair, petting him, caressing him while her head tipped back. His tongue played gently with the stiff peak, pulling back slightly and allowing his teeth to scrape the tender skin, biting down gently on the very tip.

She bit her tongue and let a needy moan come from her mouth rather than his name. She wanted so badly to say his name, to acknowledge the man who was making her feel so good. His name was burning her mouth and she just wanted to say it aloud once.

But she wouldn't because then he might stop and she felt like she would die if he did. She needed him to fill that ache inside her no one else could.

His fingers brushed ever-so-faintly over her other nipple, drawing another delicious whimper from her lips. She was so sensitive, making exquisite sounds with his every touch, her body straining and trembling in his hands, calling to him without words, using only the soft sounds of her pleasure.

Her breasts were small and firm, weighted nicely and fit perfectly into the palms of his hands. With a quick twisting movement of his body, he was now the one pressing her against the door, his mouth sucking and biting at her neck, leaving marks she would have to heal in the morning. He continued to hold her tightly against the door, bending down to take her other breast in his mouth, sucking and nipping at the silky smooth skin. If she wanted to dream he was another man, he wasn't going to make this easy on her. In the morning, he wanted to see the marks he left on her body, he wanted to leave her with something she wouldn't easily forget.

He bit down on this nipple and she squealed, her hands reaching for his head to pull him away, but he refused to move. Before she realized it, he had both of her hands above her head, pinned by the wrists to the door.

"No, no, no…" he whispered a soft reprimand against her breast, sending a shiver down her spine and kindling a warm fire deep in her belly. "Don't fight me on this." His mouth moved to kiss the valley between her breasts, licking the skin.

She should have known better than to think she could dominate him in the bedroom anytime, much less tonight while she was still feeling the effects of the alcohol. Kakashi was used to being the leader in everything and had years more experience than she did when it came to these things, so she bowed to his demands and would do as he said.

His unoccupied hand moved down her side, stroking her skin, amazed by the silky unscarred softness and surprised when he felt the lace of her panties. _Wonder what color they are?_ He mused silently. In the interest of continuing with their illusion, it was probably best if he kept their words to a minimum so asking her directly was out, but if he hid the panties, he could find out what color they were in the morning. Dropping to his knees, his mouth moved down to kiss her stomach while he carefully pulled her panties off and stuffed them in the pocket of his pants. He knew it was a dirty and perverted thing to do, but he just had to know for sure and he was already quite a pervert for taking advantage of his former student, a drunk girl 14 years younger than himself, even if he did care for her and desperately wanted her more than any woman he could ever remember. It had only taken one kiss from her sweet lips and she had wiped away nearly every thought he had of resisting.

Her hands threaded through his hair as he placed a kiss low on her belly, right above the fine patch of curls between her legs. His hands were slowly sliding up the outside of her legs, moving to the inside and ready to spread her thighs. She could feel his breath on her low stomach and accurately guessed where his mouth was going, moving to a place she couldn't bear to have him lick. It was just too personal and if she felt his tongue exploring her there or his lips sucking her clit, she was afraid she'd say something that would break this illusion, afraid she really might just call his name this time, begging him to screw her any way he could.

Just before his fingers or his tongue could dip into her, she drew his head away from her stomach and spoke just loud enough for him to hear her, "Don't, please. Not there. I can't…" Her words were soft and desperate and he understood instantly. For a quick fuck in the dark it was too much, too personal.

Without hesitation, he stood and leaned against the door, gratified by her soft sigh of relief. A moment later, her eager hands reached immediately for the buttons of his pants and her quick fingers had only unbuttoned the top button before grabbing them along with his boxers and ripping them down to his knees. Her hands closed around his hot length and she couldn't help but grin at the harsh groan he let out.

To Sakura, there was nothing quite like touching a man's erect cock. She had seen a great number of men without their pants, mostly for medical reasons and it still amazed her how the normally flaccid organ, with just the slightest stimulation, could become so very stiff and rigid.

And this time, in the dark and unable to see the expression on his face, she had to rely on his sounds and her sense of touch to guide her. She loved the velvet like texture of his skin that moved slightly over the hardness of his erection, the heat of his body radiating into the flesh of her hand. Cautiously, she stroked him a few times, pleased at his irregular breaths, the soft sounds he made and the unconscious twitching of his cock with each stroke. She had to restrain herself from leaning down and taking a quick lick at the precome that was already seeping from the tip and moistening her hand. But again, it was too personal and while she was dying to know how he tasted, she held herself back.

One of his hands moved to cup her sex, a single finger slipping through her folds, his other arm wrapped around the small of her back. With a sharp intake of breath, she released him, reaching up to wrap her arms behind his neck. The whimper and the way she clung to him for support as he slid a second finger into her, satisfied him to no end. God she was wet, practically dripping! She spread her thighs further, raising one leg to wrap around his hip and open herself more for him, a third finger joining the first two. He groaned as her inner muscles clenched around his fingers as if trying to draw him in, the tightness of her body impressing him.

Finally her mind was able to process a thought: This was getting out of hand. How could just the touch of his fingers feel so good! The stroke of his thumb on her clit the scissoring of his fingers inside her involuntarily sent her hips grinding harder into his hand. She bowed her head and rested her forehead against his shoulder, gasping for breath, the sweet scent of him filled her lungs and she couldn't help but whimper again.

Why couldn't he love her? There was no way she would be able to forget this, forget him and his strong confident fingers thrusting in and out of her, stroking her sex from the inside. She wanted him all the more for being so sweet and acting like he cared. She shouldn't allow it, but every careful caress, every kiss made her heart ache; made that little flame of hope continue to burn in the chance there could be something between them.

She had to find a way to stop thinking like this or it would hurt so much more when she could only watch him from a distance. All her thoughts about giving herself a night to remember had backfired; now she'd end up with a night she could never forget, the night of exquisite sex so good that sex with any other man would be a disappointment.

She was familiar with how painful unrequited love was and she didn't want to go through that again. She wasn't strong enough to go through that again. Because he was being so sweet to her she was having a hard time crushing that little flame of hope. Why couldn't he be rough and cruel and unmindful of any pain or pleasure on her behalf? What she really needed was for him to use her for a quick fuck and throw her aside. She might even need to have him hurt her to stop those feelings from developing even more because the longer they existed, the more it would hurt when she finally had to accept he cared nothing for her.

Why couldn't she pick men who loved her?

"I need to feel you in me… not just your fingers," she gasped, the hot breath from her demand warmed his chest. "Please… please fuck me hard and rough. As hard as possible," she begged. "Make it hurt." Bending down to kiss the skin at the crook of her neck, he withdrew his fingers from inside her and used them to hold her open for his cock. With one quick thrust he entered her, forcing her back against the door and sinking into her tight warm passage, her cry an incredible sound that pumped adrenaline through his veins.

Oh god, he was so big and so hot! She could only concentrate on how he was stretching her, how incredible it felt to have him pull back and thrust into her again, sliding in and filling her up. She felt full, that empty aching feeling was gone because he was here with her, ramming himself into her, his lips desperately sucking on her collarbone. She wished this would never end.

He slowly pulled back before thrusting into her again and again, each time a soft mewl came from her lips. She lowered her head to kiss his body, running her teeth all over his neck and shoulders, nipping the skin before soothing it with her tongue, each bite setting off a chain reaction of fire running through his veins. He couldn't believe how silky smooth and tight she was; her inner muscles rippling around him, contracting rapidly as he let out a strangled groan.

"More… harder..." she gasped out, only thinking of the exquisite sensations caused by his every movement. He complied, forcing himself into her so hard her back smacked loudly against the door with his every thrust. He bent down to bite the skin of her shoulder, his teeth almost but not quite breaking skin. He knew he was getting close, he'd been aroused since watching her in the bar and much too much time had passed since then.

"Harder," she screamed, "Faster! Hard enough to make it hurt! Please, make it hurt," she begged.

Kakashi barely heard her words as his hand slipped down between their bodies. He pulled his upper body away from her until he was able to bend down and take a nipple in his mouth, sucking on it for a moment before he bit down. At the same time his fingers reached down to pinch her clit.

Sakura let out a scream as her body started to shudder and her internal muscles contracted around his cock, squeezing him so tightly he quickly gave a rough grunt and followed her orgasm with his own. As her breathing slowed, she collapsed against him.

"Kakashi," she sighed his name so very softly he could barely hear her.

He froze, her body still fluttering around him. Did… did she just say his name? He would have preferred to savor the moment but the sound of his name jerked him back to reality immediately. Had he been imagining it? Could she have actually said his name? Was it possible she had been thinking about **_him_** during sex?

"Sakura…" he said, nudging her softly. When he received no response, he realized she was rather limp in his arms, her breathing soft and regular against his chest indicating a deep, sound sleep. He held her there, his body keeping her pressed against the door, his face buried in her hair.

Lifting her up slightly, he pulled his rapidly softening cock out of her and scooped her up in his arms, carrying her to the nearest bed. He pulled back the comforter and blankets and laid her on the bed, hesitating for only a moment before crawling in next to her and pulling her back against his body.

He again buried his face in his hair, inhaling her scent and forcing himself to relax. She smelled so good, a wonderful and unique scent of strawberries, sex and a touch of her sweat. He loved it and never wanted let go of her, enjoying the feeling of bare skin against bare skin and having someone to wrap his arm around. He'd never been one for cuddling after sex, but with her it was different. Anything to allow him to touch her and hold her close.

He was starting to feel the sake making him tired but his mind was racing with questions only she could answer. Was it possible? Was he reading too much into this? Could she actually… care for him as more than her friend and team leader? Even if he had been her teacher those many years ago? Or was that asking too much?

He couldn't very well ask her while she was asleep and he wasn't going to wake her up if he didn't have to. Depending on what the alcohol content was in those frilly drinks, he was amazed she had been awake when he came in the door, much less able to have sex without passing out. He would just have to ask her when she woke up but it didn't stop the questions from running through his mind. Would she even remember this in the morning?

If she _could_ have more than platonic feelings for him, then what would happen? Was this just a one time thing or would there be more? Could she possibly want a more steady relationship or would it just be casual? Did _he_ want a commitment or something based entirely around sex? He'd never actually had a long term relationship but he knew they were difficult to balance and took quite a bit of effort from both sides. He was used to doing what he wanted when he wanted; would she expect him to change? Could he change?

Ok, he was starting to panic a little from all these questions. What he really needed to know first was how she feels about him before he goes into all this relationship stuff. Maybe he was getting all worked up over nothing but an innocent mistake. Ah - okay, nothing was innocent about fucking his former student up against a hotel room door, but it may have just been an honest mistake. Yeah, that one worked alright.

Except just watching her with that man last night had made him so jealous he had a hard time achieving his objective with their target. Seeing her with another man, any other man, just her flirting with someone else would drive him crazy. And watching as she kissed another man goodnight… what would he do when he realized another man was screwing her… he wanted to be the only man who would ever to ever touch her again, the only man who would ever make love to her again.

All of these thoughts would have to wait until she woke up. He closed his eyes and took another deep breath of her scent and let the sleepy feelings from the sake rapidly wash over him until he was lulled to sleep.

TBC...

* * *

Helpful suggestions and reviews always welcome! (hint hint) and i'll try to update next week.


	3. Chapter 3

I know I said I'd post in a week, so here it is. For the next chapter, I will probably have to make some changes in this and the previous chapters so it may not hurt to read the whole thing once I post it as complete.

A big thanks to everyone for the reviews, I'm so glad to know people enjoy what I've written! Its so nice to open my email and read that people like this fic! And another big thanks to sesshou-lover for the constructive criticism on the last chapter.

edited: 11-30-08

* * *

When Sakura woke up, she was wrapped in Kakashi's arms, his scent surrounding her and his warm body curled around hers. She was so comfortable she wanted to cry. She hated to leave, but she _really_ had to pee and she was a little fuzzy on how many drinks she'd had. She was going to burst if she didn't go soon! Slipping out of bed carefully so as not to wake him, she headed to the bathroom.

A minute later, feeling greatly relieved, she came out into the still very dark main room; she had closed the curtains completely earlier and had been surprised at how little light was let into the room. In the end, it had worked to her advantage when trying to convince Kakashi, giving him the opportunity to imagine her as whomsoever he really wanted to be having sex with.

Stopping at the unoccupied bed to grab a blanket to wrap around her, she walked over to the curtains and opened them just the smallest bit. Judging by the full moon, she'd probably only been asleep about an hour. The pure white light of the moon lit the small city below wonderfully. Her eyes played over the numerous buildings and empty streets, enjoying the silent beauty without the bustling life one would see during more normal hours. Two days and they would have to head home, back to their usual lives filled with work at the hospital and their other team members. She wasn't quite ready to go back; she liked working with and being around Kakashi too much.

She curled up in the small chair by the window to watch the man sleeping in the far bed. His chest was bare and uncovered by the sheets and she knew, even though his lower body was covered, he was just as naked from the waist down as he was from the waist up. In the light shining in from the window, she could see the scars on his back and chest. She'd been the one who healed a good number of those wounds, trying her hardest to prevent scarring, but medical jutsus could only do so much. In the moonlight his pale body practically glowed. She was extremely tempted to slip back into his bed and cuddle up to him again. He might even, without opening his eyes to see who she was, say her name and smile softly before pulling her even closer and going back to sleep.

Yeah, right. As if that would ever happen. Yet another fantasy…

Her eyes moved to his silver hair, appearing almost white in the moonlight. He always corrected anyone who told him his hair was grey or white by telling them it silver, which, of course, his team had to tease him about constantly. They always teased him that he was old too, but as the years went by, the less difference there seemed to be between their ages. When she was 13, he was twice her age and it made him seem ancient, but now she realized there wasn't as much difference between 22 and 36 as there had been all those years ago; they'd both seen too much, killed too many people and lost too many friends and comrades for an age difference to stand in their way.

But why would he want a girl when he could have an experienced woman his own age? She'd had a little experience, but it was generally with boys who fumbled around in the dark, groping whatever body part they happened to encounter. She knew some men liked younger women solely for their appearance, but she had trouble seeing Kakashi as one of those men, at least not for a woman he wanted an actual relationship with. But she'd never known him to have any sort of long relationships with women, either. He seemed to be more of a one-night-stand type of guy – at least, that was what she'd heard in the baths. She sighed at her stupid thoughts; Kakashi wasn't a relationship sort of guy and if he ever changed his mind she would probably be the last woman he would consider.

Her eyes moved to his face, the silver hair standing on its ends and pushed back allowing her a good look at his smooth facial features. It had been a couple of years since he'd let her first see under the mask, actually it was her gift for passing the jounin exam and whenever there was a mission he had to go without his mask, she couldn't get enough of looking at him. She was one of the very few people he let see his whole face – something Tsunade kept in mind when assigning missions where he couldn't wear it. Tonight, asleep with his face bare, he took on a peacefulness that made him look younger than she did, even after all the things he'd seen and done in his life.

A few years back when he had been training her for the jounin tests, she'd pushed him to tell her about his past and how he'd gotten the Sharingan. At first he'd flat-out refused but eventually she'd struck a deal with him; each time she was able to beat him (when they first started he didn't use the Sharingan but later he couldn't spar without it), he would answer one of her questions. Of course, it worked the other way around as well so she had to share as much as she learned, but she had never been terribly secretive about her life and she was happy to tell him anything about herself if it opened the door for him to tell her about Obito and Rin and his father. Yet, at that time, he refused to show her his face, choosing to keep that important piece of himself secret.

In all likelihood, those training sessions had been when she'd started seeing him less as her teacher and more as her friend. After all, he'd been the one she ran to when she realized Sasuke couldn't love her. Kakashi had been so comforting, saying little and just letting her cry. Ino would have pointed out everything she'd done wrong and Naruto wouldn't have known how to help other than going to beat up Sasuke and then she'd have to heal them both. Kakashi, on the other hand, had just listened.

Whatever had possessed her to seduce him tonight? It didn't even count as seduction, it really had been more of an ambush. It must have been the alcohol, she reasoned. She never would have done such a thing sober. Or would she? She didn't even have a hangover and her stomach felt fine, so perhaps there was less alcohol in those drinks than she thought. She just hated to see That Woman cozying up to him and practically draping herself across his body. Of course she was jealous. She would have given anything to touch him like that, teasing and flirting with him in public. Was that what made her snap? She didn't even know what kinds of alcohol the drinks had been made with and honestly, not knowing was a very stupid thing for her to do on a mission. Even drinking on a mission was a stupid thing to do. Maybe she'd finally been pushed too far when seeing the man she wanted flirt with another woman while she was forced to watch. It really was starting to sound less and less like the drinks and more and more like she let the jealousy take control.

Her eyes returned to the man in the bed. God, he'd been good! No man had ever given her such a euphoric high, her mind and body overwhelmed with so many blissful sensations that she didn't even remember making it to the bed. He had been caring and gentle with her, almost as if he had loved her. After that, how could she ever be with another man after having him?

It wasn't until about half way through she realized she was enjoying it too much, reveling in him too much to keep things impersonal. So she begged him to fuck her hard and rough, hard enough to hurt her, but even with the forceful nature of his thrusts it hadn't hurt, it had made sex better, adding a delicious urgency to their act.

It would have been so much easier to forget about him if he was cruel and ruthless, using her only for his pleasure and ignoring her needs. But he'd been sweet and loving, ensuring she reached orgasm before coming himself. She could still feel the press of his lips and the bite of his teeth at the juncture of her neck and shoulder and how lovely his hands felt stroking her ass as he was holding her against the door without crushing her with his bodyweight. She couldn't forget the sweet taste of his tongue and how he'd teased and sucked on her nipples with his oh-so-skilled mouth.

Resting her forehead on her knees she squeezed her eyes closed. She wanted more. She wanted him again. She had stopped him from using his mouth on her clit, but in turn, she hadn't been able to taste his cock. She really wanted to kiss and lick him there, to know how he tasted and more than anything, she wanted to know the feeling of his cock in her mouth. She wanted to see him looking down at her with a loving look on his face and hear him say her name as he came, but she knew that would never happen. As teammates, they could never let it happen.

Even knowing she could never have him like that didn't stop her from wanting him. She had wanted him so bad she'd become distracted and if this had been a more serious mission, she could have gotten them killed. As it stood, her jealousy alone could have severely hampered this one. Merely watching him flirt with another woman had made her green with envy. She'd then proceeded to drink on a mission and then jump her teammate when they'd returned to their hotel. If Tsunade found out, she would suspend her or quite possibly kill her depending on the circumstances and consequences for a failed mission.

She pulled her knees in even tighter. She was pathetic, lusting after a man so much! Especially when it was Kakashi. Even in her obsession with Sasuke she'd never gone far enough to pin him against a door and practically rape the man. But that had been years ago when she was little more than a child and that had been the love for a person she'd created in her mind. The idealistic kind of love filled with pink and red hearts and flowers and holding hands. The real Sasuke was only vaguely like the boy she imagined herself to be in love with and only after their failed relationship did she finally accept it.

Kakashi was different. She knew every one of his flaws, but didn't care. That's what made him who he was. She didn't want to change him, she didn't want to re-make him to suit her every need. She didn't even mind those silly orange books as long as she was the one he loved and turned to for sex.

Lust? Could that be her problem – perhaps she only desired him for his body and not for who he really was? She sighed softly and considered it. No, it was more than just physical, that she knew. Ino had once commented that Kakashi was the one who could make her laugh the most, that whenever he was willing to join a group of them at a bar, it was she and Kakashi that ended up exchanging jokes or stories that left everyone laughing. They always sat together and teased each other. Once the blonde girl had pointed it out, she noticed herself that it was true. That she felt comfortable around him like no one else. Sometimes after training, they would lay in the grass, him with his ever-present little orange companion and she with just her thoughts, and often they would lay there for several hours, neither saying a word to each other and she'd often fall asleep next to him. There was just something about him…

What possessed her to do that? Fucking him to have a good memory to recall the following day had to be the stupidest idea she'd ever had. If she'd thought controlling her desire for him had been difficult before, now it would be insufferable and next to impossible. She fallen hard for him and she had no idea what she could do about it.

Sakura sighed again and realized how she felt didn't really matter. What mattered was how he felt and she already knew that she could never be more to him than a teammate and ex-student.

Moving from the chair, she hesitated momentarily before climbing into the unoccupied bed and pulled the covers tight around herself. She would have loved to slip back into his bed and feel his arms around her again, but she recognized that for the bad idea it was and hadn't done it. 'Cause if she did, she might never let him go.

* * *

Kakashi awoke to the call of nature; after all, consuming several bottles of sake will do that to a man. He suppressed that urge, noticing that he was alone in his bed. Sitting up, he looked over to see the sleeping figure of Sakura in the other one and sighed in disappointment. It bothered him just how disappointed he really was. He shouldn't be; it had only been a one time thing, right?

She must have opened the curtains a crack because there was a shaft of moonlight illuminating her sleeping figure, turning her hair to an almost pale lavender and making her skin a soft iridescent white. She looked so beautiful he was tempted to kiss her soft pink lips, but he didn't want to wake her. Seeing as she had moved to the other bed, he had his answer to all the questions that had been racing through his mind before he'd fallen asleep.

After returning from the bathroom, he sat on the edge of his bed to stare at his teammate sleeping in the other one. Apparently, what they'd done really hadn't been personal for her. He had been just another male body, in the right place at the right time – any man would have suited her need.

By moving to the other bed, she'd broken the fantasy he'd had going; the fantasy she might care for him as much as he cared for her. If she'd actually had any of those sorts of feelings, she would have stayed in the same bed. But she'd left.

Yet she'd said his name. Was it a Freudian slip? Was that just the beginning of a sentence she'd fallen asleep saying? He'd never had a woman pass out quite like she did, but he'd never seen Sakura drink quite so much before, either.

Her voice had been so soft and seductive, just like in his dreams. Merely thinking about it was both a glimpse of heaven and hell; hearing her whisper his name had made him unspeakably happy but at the same time, just remembering it hurt him greatly. He would never forget how she sounded during sex, between her whimpers and her moans and the soft panting breaths before she came and best of all, the way she said his name. He knew he would never get the chance to hear those sounds again and it bothered him a lot more than it should if it was just a harmless case of lust.

For a man used to pain, this was unlike anything he'd ever felt before; it was a pain from emptiness, loneliness. It was different than the usual discomfort of a wound from a weapon, those wounds would heal with time, but he wasn't sure how long it would take to recover from this. Was it possible this terrible feeling might never go away? This might just be a pain he would have to learn to live with.

At least until he could get rid of all these thoughts about Sakura. Perhaps he would ask the Hokage not to assign him as many missions with her. He just knew he would be so caught up in watching her, he would leave himself open for a mistake; after all, how long had it taken for him to get an invitation from his target earlier this evening all because he'd been thinking of her the whole time? It was unheard of for him to take that long to when manipulating a target for something as simple as a date.

The pink haired woman was so close but so far at the same time. Why had he let her in? It hadn't been intentional, but she was the only one he'd let get under that shell of indifference it had taken so many years to create. Sometimes he thought she knew him better than he did, especially when sparing. It reminded him why he kept people an arms length away; it hurt too much when they were taken from him. Besides why would she want to tie herself down with an old man like him? Fourteen years was a considerable age difference. He'd escaped death a great number of times now and every mission he took tipped the scales further against him.

His eyes came to rest on her lips and he realized he wanted more – more of her, more than just sex. He wanted her to be his so no other man would see her or touch her like he had. He actually wanted a relationship with her. He wanted to have someone to go home to, someone who came home to him, someone to spend his spare time with and someone who would love him back. And the only person he could think of ever filling that place was Sakura. She was the woman he wanted to hold closer in his arms than two people who were just friends would. For the first time he could remember since his father died, he realized the way he lived his life was rather lonely and the person who could change that was just out of his reach.

Their one night stand had only lit the fire inside him, yet there was nothing he could do about it, he thought sadly. By moving to the other bed, she might as well as told him to his face that she rejected him.

He sighed softly before crawling back into the empty bed and lying on his side facing away from her. Her actions said she didn't love him and hopefully, tomorrow they would both be able to act like nothing had happened. He prayed their ability to work as a team wouldn't be ruined by what they'd done earlier this evening, no matter how much he'd enjoyed it, no matter how much he loved her. It would only have to be for the next two days.

And he would speak to Tsunade when their mission was completed.

* * *

Next time Kakashi awoke, it was slow and gradual, something rarely done considering his profession, but the warm sensations running up his spine eventually pulled him from his sleep. Once he'd regained enough consciousness to actually start thinking, it only took a moment for him to realize the warm feeling was because of someone's touch. Lowering his head, he was surprised to find most of the covers tossed to the side while he was laying on his back, completely nude with an equally naked Sakura bent over and gently licking at his erection, her eyes closed and her mind obviously concentrating completely on the task at hand.

Dear god, he had never seen anything so beautiful as the sight before him, Sakura's naked body over him, straddling one of his legs, her hips pushed back and out, her ass stuck up in the air. With one hand, she was holding her soft pink hair back, a few escaped strands framing her face as she held his cock in her mouth her eager tongue sweetly massaging the underside as she sucked at his shaft. Each and every movement she made rubbed her body against his, the valley between her breasts lining up perfectly with his leg so her breasts were on either side of his thigh. They may have had sex just a few hours ago, but that had been in the dark when he only had the opportunity to feel her and even though they were teammates, often in odd partially unclothed situations, he had never seen her completely naked.

Until now.

This had to be a dream. It felt too good, she was just too beautiful. Yet another stupid fantasy that felt so good it couldn't be real, she couldn't be real.

She was radiant in the moonlight; absolutely exquisite, the way she bobbed her head, her tongue swirling around the head of his cock, raising her head only enough to lap the bead of precome collecting at the tip. He couldn't help but moan softly and when she heard the sound, her eyes flew open and she looked up to find him watching her, yet she didn't release him from her mouth.

It was a dream, right? It was certainly starting to feel real.

He wanted to ask her what was going on and why, after she'd moved to the other bed earlier, was she now back in his bed sucking him so skillfully. Wasn't she the one who stopped him from tasting her sweet juices only a few hours before? What had changed that made it okay for her to do something she'd prevented him from doing?

Her free hand dipped down to stroke his balls and all questions quickly fled from his mind, his brain now only able to concentrate on the incredible feelings growing deep in his belly. He no longer cared why she was touching him, and even if it was only a fantasy, he never wanted her to stop. She was currently straddling one of his legs, her body positioned far enough down that he could feel the moisture gathering between her thighs and running down onto his knee.

He couldn't take his eyes off her, watching her mouth engulf him while her vibrant green eyes stayed locked with his pair of mismatched ones. Her mouth was a hot liquid heaven, her tongue rubbing just the right spots as her hand gently massaged both the base of his cock and his balls. She took him deeper, the muscles of her throat contracting around the head. His hands reached down to thread through her hair, cradling her face and keeping it turned up toward him so he could see her.

It was real.

"Oh god, Sakura…" he couldn't help but whisper her name as she started placing kisses along his length. As soon as he said her name, she looked up at him with an almost frightened expression. She closed her eyes and pulled away from him, sitting back on his leg silently. For a moment, neither moved and he just watched her frozen figure. Then she was slowly crawling up his form, rubbing the length of her body along his until she was close enough to kiss his lips, drawing another groan from him as she rubbed her wet pussy against his erection.

"I need to ask you for a favor…" she hesitated before continuing, a look of sadness on her face. "Kakashi, I want you to fuck me again, but I want it to be rough… I want it to hurt… I need you to tell me you could never love me and I need to hear **_you_** say it to me."

He could only look at her, unable to reply. Her eyes were averted and her voice had a slight waiver to it signaling the depth of her emotions. She wanted to hear him say he could never love her? He would do almost anything for her and of all the things she asked from him, it was one thing he couldn't do. He hesitated a heartbeat before whispering his answer in her ear, "I can't Sakura." He could feel a hot tear seeping from the corner of one of her eyes and he moved to lick it away.

"Please!" she begged, her eyes closed, not wanting him to see the desperate need she knew would be visible there. Her heart was racing and the pain in her chest kept growing. Was she asking too much? Was she really so unappealing he wasn't willing to fuck her again?

"Even if… even if you won't… if you don't want to touch me again, I need to hear you say it so I can stop dreaming about you... please just tell me you could never love me so I can stop these stupid feelings… just say it to me!!!! Please…" her eyes were now squeezed closed so very tightly and her forehead rested against his while her uncontrollable tears streamed down her face and dripped onto his cheeks. She hated him for seeing her cry. She hated herself for being so weak as to cry in front of him again. She hadn't cried in front of him since she and Sasuke had broken up and she'd promised herself she would never let anyone ever see her so weak again.

"Please… I can't do this anymore!" she whispered. "It hurts too much…"

"I won't tell you something that's not true. I won't lie to you." He said softly, bringing his hand up to stroke her cheek as a small pained smile crossed his face. Tears still in her eyes, she pulled back to study his face looking for any sign of deception, her own doubt showing clearly on her face. Looking back at her, he could also see the slightest gleam of hope glittering in the green depths of her eyes.

"You… you **_could_** love me?" her voice was so soft he could barely hear her.

"Mmmhmm…" he hummed, enjoying the growing smile on her face. "I think I already do." He stretched up to capture her lips with his and he stroked her hair, enjoying the feeling of the silky strands in his rough hands.

The touch of his lips sent a fire burning through her body, quickly followed by a euphoric wave of joy and relief. He loved her. Or at least he might and even those cautious words had to be the sweetest ones she'd ever heard. She let herself relax into his kiss, the hunger of which once again stirred all the feelings in her stomach, his tongue sweeping through her mouth to tangle with hers.

Breaking the kiss, she placed a series of small quick kisses on his lips. "Do you mean it? Oh, please don't tell me you're joking, I… I couldn't take it if you said that." the desperation in her voice was so strong it hurt him a little.

"I wouldn't joke about something like this," he said, looking at her with a tender expression on his face. "I want you. I need to be near you so much more than I can even say."

Outwardly calm, his mind was still racing with questions; could she actually have meant what she said? He knew he did. The whole concept of her loving him was difficult to comprehend; he was really hoping this wasn't a cruel dream. Could this sexy beautiful woman stretched on top of him actually think of him, care for him, and maybe even… maybe love him too? The best way to find out would be to ask but a little spark of uncertainty still burned inside him. Swallowing his fear, he asked, "And me? Do you…"

She could hear the worry in his voice and she couldn't help but smile to reassure him at his obvious apprehension. "I love you, Kakashi. I've wanted to be with you so badly, I…" she swallowed hard and continued speaking. Her words started coming faster, her voice merely saying all the thoughts that were currently running through her head. "I almost screwed up our mission because I was so jealous of our target. I drank too much; I know it was unprofessional and I know I shouldn't let feelings have anything to do with our necessary duties, but I just couldn't stop thinking about you. And I hated to see her flirting with you even though it was part of our mission. And I know you're not the sort of man who'd want such a possessive woman and I'll try not to screw things up at the party tonight and–"

Kakashi chuckled softly and kissed her lips to stop her from rambling. "Its okay, Sakura. I was a bit on the jealous side last night as well."

"Of me?"

"Of the man who came over and was hitting on you."

"Oh." She thought for a second and then a small grin graced her lips. "Really?"

"Yeah, really." He nodded with a soft smile. God she loved his smile, how it lit up his whole face.

"When I, uh… jumped you earlier, why did I have to say we wouldn't use names?" Sakura asked hesitantly.

"You didn't need to say it."

"Then why did you only agree so readily after I did?"

Kakashi took a deep breath; as she was spread over him, her body rose and fell with his deeply inhaled breath. One of his hands slid up onto her low back, tracing random patterns over her soft skin. "It eased my conscience about taking advantage of the woman I wanted while she was drunk. I didn't want you to have sex with me and regret it in the morning. Without names, I figured you could imagine I was someone else. Someone you really wanted to be with. But after that first kiss, I just needed you to continue so much that I couldn't stop myself."

"Kind of ironic, I was thinking the same thing the whole time."

"Is that why you said my name? After sex?" he asked. Sakura could feel the rumble of his words reverberating through his chest and she placed a hand against his bare skin to feel those vibrations and the beat of his heart.

"I… I didn't know I did that." She said softly.

"Right before you passed out."

"I passed out?"

Kakashi chuckled softly and her body shook with his laugh. "I guess, perhaps, 'you fell into a deep sleep in my arms,' would be a more accurate description. Right as you whispered my name barely loud enough for me to hear it you nodded off."

She bowed her head and placed it on his shoulder, wriggling her body a little so she could fit her head under his chin. He let out a soft groan and she realized she was rubbing against his still erect cock. Wriggling a bit more, she was pleased at his louder groan.

"No complaints, Sakura. You're the one who woke me up and you're going to have to finish what you started…" He said his voice husky and low. She could tell he was trying his hardest to restrain himself, trying to prevent himself from flipping her over and fucking her so hard they'd destroy the mattress. With visible self-control, he asked a question that had been plaguing him. "But first tell me, why did you leave my bed earlier?"

She sighed, slid her lower body off to his side so she could reach down to take his cock in her hand, stroking him softly until she could take him back into her mouth. He let out a heartfelt groan and his cock twitched in her hand as she spoke. "I hoped you hadn't woken up and noticed I'd even left. When I woke up the first time, I thought it was for the best."

"What changed your mind?" he breathed his question, his eyes were closed and her warm hands made it extremely difficult for him to concentrate. He refused to be such a slave to his body that they couldn't continue their conversation for just a few more moments – he could hold out until her answer. Damn, how did she know exactly where to touch?

"The second time I woke up to go to the bathroom, on my way back to my bed, I stopped to look at you. I decided that if I was going to have any regrets about this night, I didn't want to have them because there was something I wished I'd done but hadn't. I wanted the full experience with you, I wanted to see you and touch every inch of your body, to kiss you and taste you because I may never get another chance." Her hand was strong and sure, stopping every few moments to run a finger around the head of his cock and gather the droplets of precome before resuming to her steady strokes.

"But now…" she trailed off. The mischievous gleam in her eyes as she stared at him told him she was done with questions for a while. "I think somebody here wants attention and I really want to finish what I started..." She changed her grip on his cock and ran her fingernails over his length, drawing a hiss from his gritted teeth. When she looked up at him, his eyes were squeezed closed and his head tipped back. Oh yes, she was _really_ going to enjoy this.

TBC…

* * *

I know it's kind of mean to stop here, but I wanted to keep the chaps under 10p each (although the next may be a little longer). And yep, there's another lemon in the next chapter. It may take a bit longer than a week for the final chapter – things are a bit nuts at work and family's coming to visit …


	4. Chapter 4

_It's done!! Yay!_

_Maybe the writer's block wasn't quite over. i could also give a giant list of reasons I didn't get this done earlier but I'm sure nobody wants to hear them. I'm not so happy with it (like most of my lemons) but it's done and when I get around to it in a few months, I'll rewrite it. hopefully i haven't repeated too many phrases. Sorry for the wait everyone._

_AND IT'S A LEMON CHAPTER - CONSIDER YOURSELVES WARNED!!!_

edited: 11-30-08_  
_

* * *

Releasing his cock from her hand, Sakura moved away from Kakashi, sitting back on her heels to stare at him in the moonlight. He was absolutely gorgeous, his well-toned body lay motionless on the bed just waiting for her. And he really was hers; she could touch and kiss each and every part of him just like in her dreams. She could stare at him, admiring his physique, enjoying the feeling of his muscles moving against her, listen to the sounds he made and hear him as he cried out her name. More than anything, she wanted to hear him say her name when he came. And he wanted her to be the one to do it to him.

She focused on his face, the soft smile and loving look in his eyes warmed her heart. This wonderful man, the one who'd been her teacher, her friend, the man she'd looked up to, the illustrious copy-nin, the man she'd wanted for so long actually wanted her in return. She was still a little amazed by his confession. She hadn't asked how long he'd wanted her, but she found herself wishing she'd forced herself on him sooner so they hadn't needed to go through all the jealousy earlier this evening.

She wasn't sure what would happen tomorrow or if he was interested in a long term relationship or what Tsunade and their other teammates would think of this, but she honestly didn't care. He was finally hers, hopefully for more than just tonight and, as there wasn't much to be done to prepare for the mission the next evening, they could stay in bed until late in the day. This time it wasn't going to be a quick fuck, this time they were going to make love and she intended to take as much time as possible to make this night unforgettable for either of them.

A smile crossed her face as she remembered waking up in his arms, feeling him holding her close and how she now knew she never wanted to wake up any other way. She was willing to do whatever it took to make that a reality.

Their eyes caught and held for a moment, the gentle smile on her lips returned to her on his and he couldn't pull his eyes away, not that he wanted to. She was exquisite sitting there, unembarrassed by the lack of clothing or how his eyes slid over her body, his Sharingan spinning slowly to burn her image into his mind. Her back was straight, her hands resting flat on her thighs, legs curled under her and she wasn't making any movements, just watching him, her slightly demure look a rarity.

"It's okay to touch, you know." His voice was low and held a teasing tone, the smile on his face turning into an irritating grin. "I thought you were going to finish what you started?"

"I will," she said. "I just wanted to get a look at you first. I already know what you feel like, but I really want to _see_ you." Raising her body onto her hands and knees, she crawled up until her head was held above his, her pink hair loose and hanging like a curtain around their faces. "I want to inspect every inch of your body… Sensei." Her voice was soft, almost a purr and his mischievous grin had spread to her lips as well.

Sensei… she hadn't called him that for years now and while he knew the title should bother him and remind him that he was so very much older than she, it didn't. Just hearing the word coming from her lips sent a tingle of energy running through him. And he liked it; if it made him a dirty old man for feeling that way, well… so be it. After all, the label was accurate, wasn't it? But what he really liked is that she obviously found it a turn on as well and he certainly wasn't above role playing if he got to see her in a sexy nurse outfit at some point.

Lowering her head, she pressed soft kisses along the scar on his face, her lips brushing the tender skin, nuzzling him softly. He closed his eyes, allowing her to kiss his injured eyelid, her gentle touch radiating warmth through his skin. No one had ever made him enjoy the touch of his scar. He turned his head to try and capture her lips with his, but she pulled away.

"No you don't." she bent down to whisper in his ear. "You told me I get to finish what I started before it's your turn, so lay still and no moving, sensei." Her warm breath tickling his ear.

"When it's my turn, I get to do whatever I want to you and you have to lay still?"

"Mmmhmm…" she replied affirmatively.

"I don't suppose you brought one of your nurse's uniforms?" Kakashi asked, a large grin growing on his face.

"I'm a medic not a nurse so I don't even own a nurse's uniform." She said disdainfully, nipping at his earlobe and tugging on it gently.

"Well, if I get you one, will you wear it?" his hands moved up to wrap around her waist, trying to pull her body down against his, but she resisted, her teeth biting harder into his earlobe until he stopped. "You know, a sexy one just for me?"

"Hmmm… depends." She released his ear to whisper breathily in his ear, sending a shiver down his spine.

"On?"

"If you're willing to let me give you a full physical exam." She was now kissing along his jaw line and down his neck.

"And what all does that entail?"

"Height, weight, temperature… the usual" she said, removing her mouth only long enough to speak before sealing her lips against his collarbone to suck gently on his skin. Good thing that even in civilian clothes, he preferred high necked shirts because she was going to leave marks all over his neck and chest. And maybe a bit lower, too.

"Remind me again what would I get for this?"

"Me in a sexy little nurse's uniform and afterward, you can give me an examination. I promise I'll make it the best physical you've ever had."

Dear god, her soft suggestive tone was practically a cat-like purr against his skin. Her hot little tongue licked a line down his breast bone, tracing little swirls onto his skin. Softly exhaled breaths first heated then cooled his wet flesh.

"Oh, yes, that'll be worth it." He groaned softly, happily agreeing with her condition. It wasn't as if he could deny her anything right now, especially when he imagined her in the skimpiest little nurse's uniform he would find.

His hands had slid up her body as she moved her mouth down over his chest, his hands coming to rest in her hair, petting her and stroking the silky pink strands. Her lips moved down to take one of his small brown nipples between her teeth, sucking softly to drawing a loud hiss from between his gritted teeth as his skin tightened.

At the sound, the corners of her mouth turned up softly. She loved seeing him like this. The famous copy-nin flat on his back, moaning in pleasure from her touch and completely at her mercy. Well, as completely at her mercy as any healthy shinobi could possibly be, but it was this incredible man who she'd admired for so many years, and had come to love.

Her tongue flicked gently at the small hard nub of flesh caught between her teeth and he groaned from deep in his chest. His nipples had never been a tender spot for him before, but with Sakura's perfect little mouth, he'd never been happier. When her lips left one and moved to the other, he let out another groan. It took all his willpower to prevent himself from grabbing her head and forcing her to move lower on his body.

Releasing his other nipple with a wet 'pop,' she pulled her mouth away from him, his hand falling softly to his side. Her eyes moved from his face and played over his chest, noting the wonderful reddened color of his nipples and focusing on his scars. She had felt those scars with her fingers last time, but now she was able to see them in the soft glow of moonlight. The severity and the placement of the large one she'd found in the dark surprised her that he had even survived such a major injury. He must have had a very good medic with him.

Lowering her head, she again pressed her lips to the damaged skin and alternated between kissing, licking and nipping as she followed its length. The sensitivity of the wound brought another groan from his lips, his hand coming up once again to stroke her hair lovingly and making her sigh softly at his touch.

She moved further down his body to place kisses on his well muscled stomach. She absolutely loved the sexy little line of hair that led from his navel further down to the wiry patch of silver hair directly above his straining cock.

Sakura looked down at the bead of liquid dripping from his tip and licked her lips. Just watching the tip of her tongue cross the delicate surface of her lips made his cock twitch. She had already proved she was more than proficient at pleasing a man with her mouth; earlier, it would have only taken her another minute sucking on him for him to have come. She glanced up at him, a hungry look in her eyes and he could only shake his head at how beautiful she looked.

Using a single finger she followed the path of hair down his stomach to touch the tip of his cock that bumped against his lower abdomen, leaving a mark of precome where his skin met and just the softest touch of her finger made him twitch again. As when she'd returned to his bed and first uncovered him in the moonlight, his size struck her. He was bigger than she'd thought when she held him in the dark. He wasn't unbelievably big, but he was definitely on the large size, leaving a bit of a challenge for her when she took him in her mouth. And if she'd enjoyed the feeling of him in her hand and mouth, she loved the sight of him. The rest of his body was relaxed, completely comfortable lying naked on the bed before her.

Bending her neck, she lowered her mouth to lick at his tip and the small drop of precome beaded there, pleased at his gasp and another twitch of his cock. His taste was slightly salty and a little bitter, but she didn't mind; this was Kakashi after all, and it tasted like him. Having been stopped by the sound of her name from his lips earlier, this time she was determined to get him off. Hearing him say her name earlier was something she'd only dreamed of and when he actually said it, her heart hurt so much she had to stop.

The sound of her name said with such passion almost had her in tears, she enjoyed the sound so much. She loved _him_ so much and hearing him say her name had given her hope that he could care for her, something, that at the time, was unfathomable. That had all led to her begging him to break her heart so she could just move on. But he told her he cared for her, that he loved her and she had never heard sweeter words.

She brought her lips down to kiss the very tip of him before taking him into her mouth, her tongue gently stroking the underside of him, dipping softly into the small v-shaped indentation at the base of the head. He groaned as she slowly sucked at him, working him deeper and deeper into her mouth, her tongue never stopping, never slowing as it stroked the large vein on the underside of his cock. She loved having him in her mouth, hard and hot, his taste and smell overwhelming her senses, the sounds of his grunts and groans filling her ears.

He looked down at her, and the sight was unbelievable, one hand supporting herself over him and the other holding her hair back and away from her face. Her vibrant green eyes were shining up at him as her mouth slid up and down on his cock.

"God, you're amazing." He mumbled, his head swimming with the sensations she was causing. "So beautiful…" his hand slid down from her hair to caress her cheek. She was real; he could feel the soft skin of her face and a few loose strands of hair brushing his hips. It was no fantasy and even though he'd woken up to this, it was still just as unbelievable. All those dreams, all those fantasies; none of them ever felt this good.

His hips began to rise and thrust himself into her mouth but she stopped him, resting her weight on his legs and pinning him securely to the mattress. Releasing him from her mouth, she kissed her way down his shaft to lap gently at his balls, alternating between kissing and sucking, tasting him and running her tongue all over him. A grunt and slight tightening of his balls told her he was close. She'd hoped she'd be able to touch him longer, tease him with her tongue longer, but she must have kept him more aroused with her hand than she had thought.

"Ah, Sakura… you're so good… I'm getting close." He whispered harshly, his head tipped back and pressed into the bed. She grumbled her slight disappointment with her mouth still closed around him and the sound from her throat only adding a slight vibration to her sucking. "Oh, god, Sakura, just like that."

She sucked harder, relaxing the back of her throat to take him deeper but continuing to rub the underside with her tongue. His hands reached down to run through her hair, petting and stroking her head, face and hair and she absolutely loved it. She closed her eyes and concentrated on bringing him off. The hand she had used to hold her hair slid down between his legs to stroke his balls.

The first touch set off his release, a fire burning deep in his belly. With a tightening of muscles and a rumbling cry, she heard him call her name. His eyelids were squeezed tightly closed as he felt her throat struggle to swallow the liquid he shot off into her mouth. She swallowed rapidly, not wanting any part to drip down her chin and continued to suck everything from him until his body completely relaxed and his cock started to soften in her mouth.

She crawled up to lay face down along side him, thigh pressed against thigh and her arm draped carelessly across his stomach. His hand fumbled for hers, finally grabbing the hand on his hip and curling it toward his mouth, kissing the palm of her hand gently.

"That was unbelievable, Sakura." he whispered, his head turning so he could speak in her ear.

"Mmmm… Glad you liked it," she mumbled into the sheets. "I know I did."

"Really?"

"Mmmhmm…" she turned her head so she could look at his bare face, their eyes catching and holding as she spoke. "I love having you in my mouth and I want to make you feel good. It's not as if it were unpleasant; I rather like the way you taste."

With her still laying on her front, Kakashi rolled onto his side and with his hand, traced random patterns on her low back.

"Have I ever told you how beautiful you are?" He asked, bending his neck to kiss her shoulder. She smiled and the warm feelings in her low stomach surged again. He'd said that before, but she liked it and would never tire of hearing him say those words. He chose her, not the sexy and attractive woman he'd flirted with earlier; he wanted to be with her.

"Such soft skin." He said, his fingers barely touching her back. "I wondered what you would feel like, what you taste like. Some nights, that was all I could think about… you were all I could think about." His hand moved up to between her shoulders, still hardly touching her. "And I never dreamed such a sweet girl could be so **forceful**."

"I wasn't sure you saw me as a woman. I was so sure you only saw me as your 12 year old student."

"I knew you were no longer my student eight years ago when I saw your chakra-strengthened fist punch the ground and break everything within 100 yards just to catch that bell. At that point, I knew you'd moved beyond my training. You'd become Tsunade's student, not mine."

"So what was I to you?"

"A teammate… and a friend… and then… more." His hand reached up to tuck her hair behind her ear so he could see her face clearly. "I had the hardest time keeping you out of my mind. Especially on missions like this where it was just the two of us."

"I always liked working with you when it was just you and me. We work well together; the man who always wins despite the potential damage to his body and the woman that heals him."

"Yeah, I guess we do. You have a certain skill with genjutsu I lack. Am I really that much trouble?"

"After every one of your missions I had to hunt you down to make sure you weren't seriously injured. You've scared me sometimes."

"I never meant to, Sakura. Every time I go to the hospital I get another lecture and they try to keep me there until I've healed. All those tubes and wire… and I kinda like that you cared enough to find me and check on me."

She flushed slightly. "Out of all my boys, my teammates, you are the one that scares me the most. Naruto's practically indestructible with the Kyuubi to save him and I know he'll keep Sasuke in line. Sai will always do whatever he can on a mission without unreasonable risks to his life and the same for Yamato. But you, you don't know your limits. Or you won't admit them. Sometimes I think you are determined to get yourself killed protecting others. Not that any of the others aren't willing to give their lives for our village, but you insist on using the Mangekyo Sharingan and it only hurts you every time you do."

"I only use it when I have no other choice." He replied softly.

"Promise me you'll be more careful? I -I don't want to lose you. Especially now I finally have you all to myself.."

"Only if you promise to come and meet me after every mission I come home from, whether I'm injured or not."

"Do I get to give you a physical then too?"

"As long as you wear the nurse's uniform I'm going to find and buy the minute we get home." His mismatched eyes gleamed with the thoughts of all the fun he could have.

Sakura smiled softly. He'd said he wanted her to check him out after every mission, surely that meant this wouldn't be a one-time thing, but there was the littlest bit of doubt. "Does that mean we're… together?" she averted her eyes and was certain she was turning bright red with embarrassment. From what he'd implied, they were, but with Kakashi, it was best to get a conformation from his own lips. After all, they had quite obviously been pussy-footing around their feelings for quite some time now, neither realizing the other's feelings.

"Together?" He asked, not quite understanding what she meant, they were obviously together on a mission and sharing the same bed… Could she possibly be asking about a relationship? He _had_ made it sound like it was something he expected from her; but did he really want that? It took less than a second for him to know his answer.

"Ah, you know, um… dating…" she risked a look up at him only to find a smirk covering his handsome features and finding that expression, she became indignant, slapping his chest lightly. "You knew what I was talking about the whole time!"

"Not the whole time, but I figured out what you meant. And honestly," his voice had dropped to almost a growl as the hand resting on her hip, drew her closer so she could feel his hot breath whisper in her ear. "I don't care what you call it. You're mine now and I'm not going to let you go."

She pulled her head away slightly so she could see his face and the smoldering, possessive look in his eyes sent shivers down her spine. Surprisingly, she found she liked it. As a woman, she had always resented being treated as a possession and not like her own person, but this was different. This was Kakashi. This was the man she wanted to be with more than anything.

"Then _you_ belong to _me_, too." She whispered huskily and was rewarded with the most intense kiss she'd ever had, it was like he wanted to completely consume her, his low growl pleasing her immensely. She started to roll over onto her back, but he stopped her with a firm hand.

"My turn, remember? Stay just like that and tell me when I do something you like." He pulled away far enough to lay her on her stomach again before rising to his knees and straddling her legs, resting the slightest bit of his weight on her thighs. Brushing the hair off her shoulders, he bent forward to place a kiss at the base of her neck. Pulling away, he ran his hands over her bare shoulders, at first gently stroking her skin, but soon changing to massage the tense muscles between her shoulder blades.

His eyes strayed over her pale smooth skin, settling on a few of the marks on her neck and shoulders that he had left with his mouth during their first encounter. A finger moved to touch one of them, the individual tooth marks still visible. "I left marks."

"Is that good or bad?"

"I don't know. Is it? Do they hurt? If they do," he said, unable to look away from the wounds. None of them had broken skin, but they had all been red and two had started to bruise. "I'm sorry," he mumbled as he gently kissed one.

She replied with an unladylike snort that surprised him. "Why? I think I like them and I believe I asked for it rough, remember? I wanted it to hurt almost as much as I wanted to remember it. They don't hurt and even if they did, I can fix them myself. Here, guide my finger to one of them." She raised her hand and reached behind her, pointer finger extended. He took her hand and drew her finger toward the worst mark. As soon as her finger touched the skin on her back, a pale green stream of chakra flowed into the damaged skin and the mark healed before his eyes.

When the green light faded and she removed her finger, he bent forward and kissed the healed flesh, his lips tingled slightly with the remaining chakra in her skin.

"I'm a kunoichi, remember, not some delicate little flower. I can handle a little pain. Actually… I like it a bit rough."

"So you don't mind? You really are a dirty little girl."

"Mmmhmmm," she agreed, turning her head to let him see the mischief in her bright green eyes. "I guess I am. I've kinda had a thing for my teacher for some time now, too. How about you show me what you can do."

"Happily," he said with a smirk. Moving his hips a little, he drew his rapidly hardening cock along the crack of her ass. She whimpered softly, struggling slightly, trying to push her hips back into his.

Lowering his body over hers, he bent his neck to sink his teeth into her shoulder, not drawing blood but leaving little indentations into her skin. She groaned and wriggled under him. Releasing his grip of her shoulder, he bathed the area with the flat of his tongue and judging by her response, she didn't mind the mark.

Settling back on his legs, he slowly drew his hands down her sides, barely touching her soft skin with a feather-light touch. She had a graceful and elegant figure, displayed even better as she had her arms raised to pillow her head. Well-proportioned breasts, currently pressing down into the bed, and a narrow waist leading down to the soft flare of her hips. How could she have actually believed he couldn't see her as a woman? She was the most gorgeous woman he'd ever laid eyes on, creamy pale skin with few visible scars. Being a medic meant she could heal her own wounds – provided she had enough chakra after tending to her teammates because, of course, they came first to her.

And she was his. All his. He hadn't had much experience with long-term relationships, never really wanted one before, but he knew he would do whatever it took to make this work, whatever it took to keep her. The mere thought of another man seeing her, touching her like this made him jealous beyond words.

Leaning forward, he placed gentle open mouthed kisses along the length of her spine, only stopping just above her tailbone. He hesitated, keeping his lips pressed to her skin and inhaling her scent. Sliding his arms around her waist, he lifted her ass until her knees could support her own weight.

"Hold it there for me, beautiful."

Turning her head yet keeping her upper body against the pillows, she looked at him questioningly. He merely gave her a mischievous smile and forced her legs apart so she was in a tripod-shaped sort of arrangement with her ass sticking up in the air. She was a little embarrassed by her position, but she had promised to do whatever he wanted. Keeping his eyes locked with hers, he used a single finger to draw a soft trail down the cleft of her ass, through her wet slit until his finger reached her clit. Her teeth sank into her lower lip as she tried to muffle her cry when he flicked the tender bundle of nerves, her hips wiggling and her head turning away so she could no longer see him, burying her head in the pillow she gripped in her arms. The last bits of embarrassment disappeared only to be replaced with the euphoric feelings he was evoking.

"Sakura," the way he said her name sent the warm feelings in her stomach churning, a fluttering of butterfly wings at the pure and clear desire in his voice. His finger slid up to plunge into her aching body, pistoning in and out and drawing a whimper from her throat. "There's no need to be quiet. I want to hear every single… solitary… sound you make… I want to know how I make you feel." His finger thrust in and out, emphasizing his words.

"So good…" she whispered between her panting breaths. "How… can you… make me feel… so very good?" he withdrew his finger, making sure to brush against her clit before drawing it in his mouth, sucking loudly so she could hear him as he tasted her, giving a small groan to let her know he enjoyed it.

"Because," his voice was strong and filled with promise. His head had moved until his face was mere centimeters from the plump, swollen lips of her pussy, the heat from his exhaled breath teased the already tender skin between her legs. The fingers of one hand spread her open wide and she shivered with the breath from his next words. "I'll do everything I can to keep you, do whatever it takes for you to be mine. I need you and I think you need me. Do you need me, Sakura?"

"More than anything—" her voice broke off into a moan as she felt his lips close around her clit. She couldn't help but bite her lower lip and try to twist her hips, but he still held her firmly as his tongue stroked the sensitive bundle of nerves, her breathing turning ragged with her whimpers. Her body was trembling and she struggled to keep from grinding her hips onto his face, afraid he would stop if she pushed back against him too hard.

"Stay still," he commanded, releasing her clit to speak but replacing his lips with a finger that continued to tease her. At the same time he reprimanded her with a small smack on her left butt-cheek, the sound of flesh slapping flesh ringing through the room. To his surprise, a small flood of her sweet juices flowed over his hand.

"You enjoyed that, didn't you?" she could _hear_ the smirk in his voice and she tried to shake her head back and forth to deny his accusation, but the slippery liquid on his hand told him otherwise. "I always thought you were this innocent little girl who would never be turned on by something as kinky as spanking, but I guess I was wrong, wasn't I Sakura?" The hand that had spanked her rubbed soft circles over her reddened flesh. He lowered his mouth to kiss the flushed skin, causing a soft gasp of surprise from the woman propped up on the bed. She turned her head again so she could speak.

"You never counted on me pinning you against the door of our hotel room and forcing myself on you during a mission either." The soft rumble of his laughter sent the feelings in her stomach fluttering again. She would never tire of hearing the intoxicating sound of his laugh, his real, warm laugh, not the forced sound of amusement he often gave to others.

"No, I certainly never counted on that… but I liked it," he said, lowering his mouth again to lick at the juices practically dripping from her, earning another whimper. "A lot."

Moving his finger away from her clit, he slid it into her opening, reaching as deep as he could and curling it to tease her even more. Her groan told him he'd reached the right place and he repeated the gesture faster, her hips now rocking back and forth, grinding on his hand.

"There… Oh, yes… right… there." She struggled to speak, her whole body overtaken by the amazing feelings flowing through her. He lowered his mouth to lap at her clit sending a bold of pleasure through her body and causing her to whimper again.

No man had ever made her feel this good, much less by only using his tongue and a single finger to do it. The strong, rough-textured muscle took gentle strokes, licking her from her clit up to swirl around the finger still curled dip inside her, involuntarily drawing helpless mews of pleasure from her. Removing his finger, he sank tongue into her, the suction from his mouth drawing out all her juices from inside. The tightening swirl of emotions in her stomach built with his every movement. God, he was good at this. Too good at this, she thought just before he took her clit in between his teeth and tugged gently, making her squeal and close her eyes tight.

"Please…" she found herself gasping for breath. "Please, Kakashi, I'm close… please…"

"Please what, Sakura?" he asked drawing back to where he could watch his finger circle her clit, making stroking motions before slipping down into her to gather some of her juices before sliding further along her slit to press at the puckered little hole clenched so tightly. Tentatively, his finger pressed against the tight skin, her body refusing to yield to him.

"Not there. Please… I want to feel you inside me again."

"Like this?" his hand returned to slide two fingers into her dripping pussy, separating his fingers to stretch her tight skin and pulling a groan of frustration from the girl.

"No, I don't want just your fingers, I want to feel _you_ inside me…" she knew she was begging, but she was beyond caring. The only thing she wanted was to feel him pounding into her, his balls slapping her clit, making her come on his hot, thick cock.

"Say it, Sakura. Tell me what you want. Tell me what you need me to do."

"Fuck me. I need you to fuck me hard… Kakashi, I want your cock inside me… please…" She wriggled her hips, rocking backing and forth, trying to tempt him into giving her what she wanted. "Nowww…"

Since you asked so nicely," he replied and with one quick movement, she found herself on her back with him balanced over her, the heavy weight of his body pressing her comfortably back into the mattress. The heat of his cock pressed insistently into her thigh, a few drops of precome wetting her skin and his hardness telling her silently how much he wanted her. How much he needed her. With one quick thrust, he was inside her, her body stretching around him, already clenching him tightly in her warm wet passage. He drew back, her flesh pulled at him, unwilling to let him go, but he drew back almost far enough to leave her body before forcing himself back in, her body stretching to accept his long, slow thrusts.

Her sigh of contentment gave him a sense of satisfaction almost better than the feeling he had when sinking into her. Almost. Her head tipped back, offering him the pale, slender column of her neck, something he happily took advantage of, lowering his mouth to suck and nibble on her skin. His thrusts where hard now, all thoughts of restraint disappearing in the pleasure from her body and the sounds she made, her legs wrapped around him, holding him tight and her fingernails sunk into his back.

His mouth kissed a path down her neck, nipping at her collarbone before moving down to latch onto a nipple, teasing it with his tongue. She whimpered when he rolled the tight bud carefully between his teeth. Opening her eyes, she glanced down at the man sucking at her breast and smiled, moving one hand from his shoulder to run through his silver hair. Surprisingly, his hair was soft as a kitten and she couldn't help but smile as she held his head in place.

She felt full and complete, feelings she'd been searching to find for so long, never quite sure how to fill the emptiness, the loneliness. Until him. The sorrow from losing teammates and colleagues and her inability to save those too badly injured; he made it all go away. He made her feel that despite all those she'd hurt in her life, despite those she couldn't save, she was important and there was hope that she made a difference. All this from one man, the one man that until today, she wanted but couldn't have, the one she loved from a distance and who loved her back.

He wanted her, she marveled, stroking his hair. He loved her and cared for her and wanted to be with her and was making her feel so very good, so needed. This amazing, sex-god of a man, the man she'd dreamed of so often actually wanted her to be part of his life. The man who made her feel whole. That was what made this night so much more incredible, that he cared and only as the feelings low in her stomach started to build, twisting and growing, could she begin to believe this wasn't just some wonderful dream, it was real.

Then he hit that certain spot, that spot that made her inhale sharply and her back arch away from the bed, her fingernails scraping across his skin. In a bright flash of light, all thoughts disappeared from her mind, the only thing she could think of was the feeling growing inside her. With every thrust, she could feel the thick vein on the underside of his cock rub against the taut skin of her opening. Her body was trembling, enjoying the building of pleasure, the anticipation of release as he sucked hungrily at her breast.

The muscles of his body tightened above her, trying to prolong this moment, wanting to hold off on his own release until she came, until he had the chance to watch her come. He wanted to see her face, hear her cry out, to memorize every part of this moment so he knew what he was able to look forward to with a life with her.

He released her breast and moved to kiss her full lips, quickly teasing her tongue into his mouth, twisting and twirling it with his own. She had such a sweet mouth, the taste of her flooding his mouth. It pleased him to no end knowing she didn't hesitate to kiss him even though he'd been tasting her female juices only moments before. Her tongue danced with his, ghosting over his hard palate and his teeth, only stopping for a breath and to stare deep in his eyes.

Keeping their eyes locked together and making another long, hard thrust with his hips, he separated their lips and moved his mouth down toward her breast. Still watching her, he sucked the red and highly sensitive nipple into his mouth teasing it slightly with his tongue.

Then with another thrust of his hips, he bit down on her nipple.

The fireworks behind her eyes exploded as a wave of unbelievable pleasure washed through her body and the cry of his name broke from her lips. He was so deep, reaching places previously untouched, stroking her, filling her, making her his. She shuddered helplessly, her body shaking and trembling under his, her breathing rapid and uncontrolled in quick indrawn gasps. Small, unnoticed tears leaked from the corners of her eyes, her mind unable to focus on anything but him.

Her body clamped down around his cock, the muscles surrounding him milking him so hard he had to struggle to restrain himself. Only able to thrust into her a few more times, he lost his tightly held control and let himself come inside her, his own body racked pleasure.

Releasing the nipple from his mouth, and receiving a grateful whimper from her, he rolled to his side and collapsed onto the bed, careful to keep most of his weight from falling on her. Both of them were still gasping for breath, neither having experienced this intensity of sex before. Reaching up, Sakura pulled part of his weight back over her body.

"Stay close," she mumbled, eyes closed and face nuzzled into his shoulder. "I like feeling you over me."

"Whatever you want.' He happily agreed, pulling her closer. He pulled a blanket over their intertwined bodies before joining her in sleep.

* * *

Kakashi awoke the moment she moved in his arms but pretended to be asleep until he felt her hand caress her cheek. Opening his eyes, he stared at her, studying her face and the brilliant green eyes watching him. The afternoon sun shone through the crack in the curtains lighting the tousled pink curls of her hair. Eventually, she turned her head to look at the clock on the nightstand between the beds.

"We should probably get ready for the party," she said but not yet moving from the bed.

"Yeah, suppose we should." His eyes were drawn to her lips as he contemplated kissing her, but he knew that if he did there was no way they would leave the bed until the next day. She sighed and finally threw the covers back to climb out of the bed, giving Kakashi a nice view of her naked body, something that sent a wave of arousal to his cock.

"Whenever you're around me, I don't want you to wear clothes." He said with a mischievous grin. She turned around and raised an eyebrow.

"I think that might cause some problems on things like training sessions and missions."

"Hn. I suppose you're right. That _would_ allow other men to see you naked, and then I'd have to kill them, so maybe you should only be naked when we're alone." He sat up and watched her gather the clothing scattered around the room.

"Only if you are…" she replied as she shook out his crumpled up pants. She started to fold them up when a little scrap of red cloth fell out of one of the pockets. She had to bend down to pick it up from the floor and Kakashi, realizing what it was, quickly formed several hand signs. Sakura, upon picking up the fabric and realizing they were her panties, spun around to see a small puff of smoke dispersing from the bed Kakashi had been sitting on. Hearing the sound of water running in the bathroom, she quickly moved over to the door and threw it open.

"Kakashi," she said, entering the bathroom and pulling aside the shower curtain. She swallowed hard when encountering so much wet Kakashi flesh, and had to force her mind to return to the red cloth in her hand. "Why were my panties in the pocket of your pants?"

Ignoring her question, he grabbed the shampoo and started to lather his hair, sending streams of bubbles down his body. Once again, her mind was struggling to remain on topic, his wet body tempting her hands to reach out and touch him, to stroke his well muscled form. Her eyes glanced down to see him already erect, his cock straining upward, just the sight of him making her mouth water and a fire starting in her belly. Why was she standing outside the shower just watching when she could be in the shower with him touching that gorgeous body?

Wait. She was annoyed with him for something… oh, yes, her panties were in his pocket. She wasn't angry; she just wanted to know why.

"Kakashi…" she said, wanting an answer before her brain completely fried and she jumped him where he stood. "Just tell me."

Without saying anything, he reached over and pulled her into the shower with him, the spray of warm water hitting her shoulders and relaxing her instantly. When he tipped her head back to kiss her hungrily, his tongue sweeping through her mouth, she dropped the scrap of lace into the water swirling at their feet and completely forgot about her early question.

When their kiss finally broke, he leaned her back against the cool tile wall and bent down to whisper in her ear. "It was dark last night and while I could feel your panties, I wondered what color they were, what they looked like. As I didn't think you'd ever let me see them again, I stuck them in my pocket so I could find out later."

"You wanted a souvenir, didn't you?" She said in astonishment. "You were actually going to keep them, weren't you?"

He nodded his head ever so slightly, and gave her a smile. "Probably. Unless you caught me." He lowered his mouth to nuzzle her neck. "But now that I have _you_, I don't really need them anymore, right?" His hands grabbed her ass and pulled her against him, his warm, hard erection pressing into her belly.

"Kakashi…" she groaned as he rubbed against her. "We need to get ready for the party tonight."

"Shhh… I promise we'll make it fast and hard and we'll still be on time." He bent down and kissed her again, her mind fogging at his skilled touch.

"Fine, but it's your fault if we're late and can't complete our mission."

"We'll make it, besides it's fashionable to be a little late…"

"Famous last words…" she said, only to be cut off by his lips. Maybe they would be a little late, but knowing his habitual lateness, she had set the clock ahead an hour the second time she'd woken up, just before crawling back into his bed. It all meant they had a bit over an hour before they absolutely had to be out of the shower and could still make it somewhat on time and she intended to use that extra time pleasurably.

* * *

_Review? Please?_


End file.
